Why ENFJs Struggle With Being Too Empathetic + How To Handle It
ENFJ stands for extroverted, intuitive, feeling, and judging, and with just 2.5% of the population falling under this type, it’s one of the rarest ones out of the 16 personalities. They’re a very friendly and outgoing type, but they can also struggle when it comes to putting their own needs before others’ needs.
As Michael Segovia, a senior consultant at The Myers-Briggs Company, previously explained to mbg, when ENFJs make decisions, they are truly concerned about their impact on other people. “This, however,” he explains, “can lead them to spend so much time making accommodations to give people what they want that it can become exhausting for them, especially if they don’t take care of themselves first.”
The unfortunate reality is that sometimes people take advantage of those with too much empathy and not enough boundaries. When we empathize without boundaries, we’re more likely to get caught up in one-sided relationships, make excuses for inexcusable behavior, and diminish our own needs—all at the expense of our own well-being.
While it’s certainly not a bad thing that ENFJs want to help people, John Hackston, head of thought leadership at The Myers-Briggs Company, adds that sometimes it can be too much even for the people you’re trying to help. “Sometimes ENFJs overstep people’s boundaries without noticing,” he notes.