For example, if you’re going down on a woman using a particular type of stroke and she says, “Don’t stop,” that does not mean “go faster.” Yet it’s a mistake that many people make.
It’s easy to see why: For people with penises, speeding up stimulation is often the go-to plan of action to reach orgasm. But it’s not always that way for people with clitorises, with many requiring consistent (aka not slower or faster) stimulation to finish.
“Consistency is important because stimulating the clitoris in the same way that works for someone is a very reliable way to help a woman or clit owner to experience orgasm,” Engle explains. She notes that if something is working for them and you’re getting a positive reaction, keep doing it.
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