The Challenges Of Embracing Vulnerability As Parents + What To Do
Parenting is deeply vulnerable—and most of us are afraid to be open and reveal about what’s really going on behind closed doors. Even if we know better, we compare ourselves to the bright happy faces on social media where everyone has it together doing cool things. While many will admit our daily lives as parents are filled with moments we would not want to expose—meltdowns, messy houses, doubts, inadequacies, fears we are failing at the job—we are cutting ourselves off from potential care and much needed support.
I am inspired by the leadership of the Legend family to break the norm of what is deemed “appropriate” to share. Out of this paradigm breaking choice, look at the gratitude, care and support that flooded in.
As a first step on the road to experiencing the power of our vulnerability do an inventory of all the mistaken beliefs and rules in our culture and your family that may limit you.
As a result of operating under these mistaken beliefs, we think our vulnerabilities are ugly and should be hidden. I offer a metaphor to help us think differently: Would you say the Grand Canyon is ugly and should be covered up and hidden? I doubt it. But isn’t it nothing more than wound on the earth’s surface—a crack that over time and, being exposed to the elements, has become a wonder of nature and sit on the edge of it in awe of its beauty?
If we’re not willing to show ourselves and risk being hurt, there is no way to meet our deeper yearnings to be truly seem, known, supported, and loved. When you’re in your most vulnerable state, it triggers natural protectiveness from others around you. There are no guarantees and sometimes we will get hurt, but we are not meant to be impermeable, hardened, or shielded. Our greatest vulnerability can be our greatest strength.
Imagine your life, and our world, if we let ourselves be seen, deeply seen, and we loved ourselves and others with our whole heart. We can choose in any moment to stop screening and editing and start listening to, and acting from our vulnerable, kinder and gentler voices. And, best of all, to fully experience and acknowledge my vulnerability means I am alive!