How A Human Design Session Helped Me Uncover My Bipolar 2
During the height of my discomfort, I became curious that human design might offer up some answers or at least a new perspective. It was described as a system of self-understanding that helped people put words to their natural gifts and energy so they could live with less resistance and more ease.
That was a big promise, especially for a star-skeptic like me. But I knew that my life of dramatic ups and downs was blocking my ability to be consistent with anything, and I was desperate to understand why, so I decided to give it a go.
I still had my birth stats top of mind from last year’s astrology reading, which wasn’t my cup of lavender tea, so I plugged them into the Jovian website and downloaded my HD chart. Up came a sci-fi-looking graphic.
Since I don’t speak Stranger Things, I went into my podcast app and searched “human design.” Up came a potpourri of episodes, which I added to my queue, and after a week of binge listening, I had a solid understanding of what being a “generator” meant. Must. Do. Things. When. Lit. Up.
OK, got it, I thought. But I get lit up and dimmed down an awful lot, even about the same things. I am bursting with creativity one day and unable to formulate the words for an email the next. I can jog a 7:30-minute mile with a smile on a Monday, and then by Wednesday it feels like I’m running through organic fair-trade raw honey at a 9-something-minute pace. How does that all fit in?
When I’d exhausted the plethora of podcasts, I, of course, got serendipitously introduced personally to an HD reader in my female mastermind group. Nikki Brafman came in to give an overview of this ancient-wisdom-influenced New Age–science-infused modern-science-swayed school of understanding oneself. I loved her.
As we took a deeper dive into my chart, she taught me that the whole purpose of human design, or any personality reading, is to integrate your new self-knowledge into your life.
“As a generator, ease comes when you wait to be lit up, before committing your energy. Make a list of what lights you up and what doesn’t,” Nikki suggested.